Letters To My Sons | December

Dear Grey,

Cash was about your age when he first became obsessed with trains so you are following right behind, or should I say, right on track. I know, an eye-rolling pun, but I couldn't help myself and in any case, it's true. You get excited each day when it's time to ride the subway and spend most of your play time in your room, cheek to the floor and butt in the air, rolling train cars along wooden tracks. It only made sense then, that Pow Pow should take you to see the freight trains during our recent visit.    

There is an old abandoned bridge near Grandma and Pow Pow's house, open only to pedestrians, where if you wait long enough you're sure to see train lights in the distance. I don't think you really knew where we were going or what we were looking for. But once that first train came down the tracks - right underneath where we were standing! - you knew exactly. And then could hardly wait for the next one to come.

Trains don't run that often on holidays so we were thankful to catch two of them barreling down the tracks. I, for one, was amazed at Pow Pow's endurance. I know just how heavy you are (a thirty-eight pound future nose tackle for the New York Giants!) and he didn't flinch, holding you for a good couple minutes each time while you counted train cars. Your great-grandfather (Pow Pow's dad) lived to be 100 years old and Pow Pow is a fit 82, so you come from good stock boy. Strong-Like-Bull stock!  

Pow Pow said that they are planning to tear down this old bridge sometime next year, so I'm grateful you had the chance to go trainspotting before this trusty lookout is no more. A lifelong train fanatic himself, Pow Pow discovered the perfect place where you and your brother could get up close and "feel" the freight's awesome power beneath you. "Go ahead and wave," Pow Pow always says as the train is just about to reach the bridge and it's never long before you hear the whistle blow.

I often imagine what the train engineer is thinking when he sees us standing there on the bridge. Does it remind him of when he was a boy? Of days spent watching trains with his own father or grandfather. Did he always dream of becoming a train engineer? I don't know the answers, but one thing is for sure. He most certainly sees tremendous joy and love looking down from above.

My dear son, throughout your life many trains will come and go and maybe a couple of old bridges will be abandoned and torn down. But you'll always have memories like these to remind you of how you are loved. Especially how much Pow Pow loved you and wanted to see you smile. 

Like the awesome power of the freight trains you so admire, may your wildest dreams carry you to the farthest reaches of this world and may your heart and will remain strong. Strong. Like. Bull. 

Always & forever,

Mom

Letters To My Sons | November

The idea of bunk beds came up over a year ago when Cash asked for them. We decided to wait until Grey was old enough to move from the crib to a big boy bed, allowing me plenty of time with my trusty measuring tape. Weeks followed with various deliveries while entire days were devoted to breaking down old furniture and putting together new pieces. I did the interior decorating and Daddy did the back breaking work - poor guy!  But Cash, you helped out a great deal, hammering nails and using the drill for the first time -- so proud to be building alongside your Daddy. 

It was a given who would sleep in which bed. That's the blessing of having you guys two and a half years apart; there's no fighting over the top bunk. Grey was just happy for the upgrade. Once the mattresses arrived and the magic bumpers to keep Grey from rolling out of the bed, you guys jumped right in. "My bed," Grey said, pulling the covers up to his chin and squeezing his eyes tight as if he were sleeping. Crib life was officially over. Bunk Life was happening NOW.

I had always imagined your room would be FULL of color - a happy place for you guys to spend your time. In fact, it's kind of become the room where we all want to spend time. It just makes you feel good. I can't tell you the number of times Daddy has walked in and said, "If I had had a room like this when I was growing up...This is amazing." 

So one "Pizza Bunk Friday" I took photos of you two in your element, which I feel tell a greater story than any words I could ever write. Plus it will be cool for you guys to have them when you take a trip down memory lane -- "Remember when we lived in Harlem and had bunk beds?" -- sharing memories and secrets I'll never know.

[Click on each image to view in full scale]

My ear to the door has heard Cash reading a story to Grey and scurrying feet to the toys bins followed by whispers and giggles. We're still in a stage of practice, so those nights when you guys keep each other up far too late, Grey is sent back to his old room. And then, if Daddy is snoring a bit too loudly, I quietly slip into Grey's bottom bunk (which, by the way, Cash thought was hysterical the first time it happened). Like I said, the room that brings everyone joy.  

Stars are a bit of a theme in this family, so the star string lights we recently hung over your bunks added that final touch of magic. The only thing left now my sons, is a wish for countless sweet dreams and late night secrets in your little man cave. And always...always..."Pizza Bunk Friday".

I love you to the stars and back, Mom 

Who We Become | November's Hotshot

A mom I know mistakenly signed her two year-old up to run in the annual Ronald McDonald Charity Run that takes place every November in Central Park. The minimum age is four. She blames it on "mommy brain" which I suffer from frequently and therefore can totally relate. Needless to say her little guy ran, was cheered on by the Yonkers fire department, and is my 'hotshot' for the month. Way to go buddy!

Click HERE to continue along the circle, starting with my talented friend Lisa Rigazio. Also visit our collective site, Who We Become, to see a mosaic of our favorite shots for the month of November.

Letters To My Sons | October

Dunna-Nunna-Nunna-Nunna-Nunna-Nunna-Nunna-Nunna

BATMAN!!!

Hey there Grey Grey,

Well, we stumbled upon this year's costume during one of our strolls through Party City. We like to pop in there on our way to pick up Cash from school, mainly to ride the escalator with the green disco lights. But because Halloween was fast approaching, there were aisles and aisles of costumes for us to wander. The batman mask was the one you obviously chose and in my opinion, suits you perfectly - especially with nothing else on but a diaper. I'm sorry boo, but the diaper just adds to the adorableness of it all. It's a shame you can't just wear that trick or treating! 

When I showed Cash this black and white photo of you he said, "Wow Mommy, that's a really nice smile from Grey." It sure is. You may not look like the meanest batman in town, but at least you're not confused about it. You're just happy to be fighting crime alongside big brother, the mighty Power Ranger.

Last year for Halloween you were a lobster. A lobster who couldn't walk and had to be transported everywhere. Originally Daddy and I had wanted to put you in steampot that we carried around wearing chef hats, but you were too heavy and a stroller was far easier on our backs. This year though, you can walk on your own up to each house for a trick or treat, filling your very own bag of candy. After Dad steals the Mr. Goodbars and I sneak the Skittles, you'll whittle your stash down three pieces a night, so I guess it's a good thing you just went to the dentist for the first time.

In fact, lately there've been couple of firsts: your first year of preschool, your first night in a big boy bed and your first 90 minute movie in the theatre. While watching cartoons, your giggles are most enjoyable, but even more so is where you find the humor. You love running down the sidewalk ahead of me and jumping off every brownstone step along the way with your older brother. Riding the subway is one of your favorite things to do so you'll run and grab your shoes whenever I say it's time to go to the train. You make it a point to show me every bus, doggy and acorn that crosses our path. And you say, "Hi Daddy" to every man that walks by which always makes for an interesting exchange. So it goes without saying Grey Grey, that life is never boring with you.    

 

 

I've been thinking that the face you make - where you scrunch your nose and squint your eyes - might be a little too adorable for the dark knight. And the way you say, "Mommy I LUH YOU" may not necessarily be the voice of Gotham's caped crusader. But I swear, I could listen to it over and over. And I do. The diaper? Well, as Batman himself says, "It's not who I am underneath, but what I do that defines me." 

So Lil G, I hope you have a ghoulishly Happy Halloween with Red Power Ranger by your side. May you always fight for what is good and right, and know that without a doubt, you are already MY SUPERHERO.

I LUH YOU.

Always & Forever, Mom  

 

 

 

* Update: It took you a little while to get the hang of trick or treating. The first couple of brownstones, you did the reverse: you actually gave the person a piece of candy from your bag instead of receiving one and the grown-ups had a good laugh over this. Then you would ask Daddy to open it up as soon as you got it. You must have had a dozen mini chocolate bars, half of which remained on your face. But you had a blast with your buddies, proudly marching on to the next house for the next treat.

Letters To My Sons | September

Happy birthday my love. Five years ago today you came into this world and changed our lives for the better. What a cliché thing to say, but it's entirely true. The enthusiasm you have for life and for sharing it is beyond compare, that sometimes all I can do is look into those twinkly brown eyes and thank God for you.

The other night I sat at the edge of your bed and we talked about what you wanted to do on your birthday, what you hoped you'd be getting. Of course it was ALL about Power Rangers - Megazords, Vivixes, Sledge and anything Dino Charge -- complete crazy talk to me. But it's what you're into right now, and you're always so excited to describe the different characters and fighting scenarios. Just to let you know though, I secretly recorded our talk. I had to preserve that sweet little voice of yours -- what you'd call a "sound snapshot" -- from a year so great I often wish I could freeze time. 

A couple of days ago while we were walking home from school, I realized that I almost never ask you to hold my hand. You do it automatically and all the time. But in my heart I know these days are numbered and it makes me a teensy bit sad. When I asked you later if you'll still hold my hand when you're Five, you laughed and said, "Yes, Mommy!", then pinky promised to hold my hand when you when you are 10, 18, 25 and even 50 years old!  "FIFTY!!??" I said, "That means I'll be 86! How awesome will that be??!!"  

I know I've said this before, but you have grown into a loving, caring and confident older brother. Grey absolutely adores you and follows you everywhere. Even when he's in preschool (which he just started this year), he'll point to the door and say "Cash" to let his teachers know he wants to go to your classroom. The other day both of your classes were outside at the same time and you guys ran over to hug each other through the fence. Every grownup watching had a hand on their heart because it was so sweet, while one of the teachers ran to open the gate so you guys could give each other a real embrace.   

 

First steps

 

Sweet Cash, I know it's inevitable that each year you will add another number to your age. You'll grow taller and bigger, until one day you're looking down at me, forearm resting on my shoulder. You'll be a grown man with so much going on in your life that it will be hard to remember a time when you were so small and in need of guidance. But for now, I love that I can pick you up and tickle you silly, that your small hand is still cocooned in mine and that you pinky promised to hold it even when you are fifty years old.

So my love, I joyfully wish you happy birthday and pray for a fantabulous year ahead. Just so you know though, I'm going to hold you to that pinky promise we made the other night. Cause I've got it all on tape. :)

I love you son.

Always & forever,

Mom

Farewell Summer

The boys would like to thank New York City's mass transit - the subway, busses, ferries and water taxis - for taking them to all of our favorite places this summer. All in all it was an excellent ride.

Farewell summer and see you next year.

The Color Collaborative : Red

This month is RED and luckily I found a great deal of the color during our recent summer outings to Coney Island and Times Square. 

Please click HERE to continue along our circle, starting with the very talented Kara Orwig.

Letters To My Sons | August

Dear boys,

As summer comes to a close, I could talk about how fun it was going to the beach, or the Saturdays mornings we got up early with Daddy to play basketball or the day at the farm when you guys rode in the wooden firetruck. But that's not what I loved most. What I loved most of all was watching your brotherhood grow. You see, this time last year Grey wasn't walking and of course wasn't talking, and I remember looking ahead to the time when you boys could run around together, when we could ditch the stroller and go have some fun. And, well, this summer was it! 

[Click each image to view full scale]

When talking about your brotherhood I'm including all of the hi's and the lo's, all of the growing pains involved with such a bond. One of the sweeter moments this past month was when I peeked around the bedroom door to find Cash reading one of Grey's animal picture books to him, and Grey trying to repeat the words back. Everyone in the house can't help but laugh when Grey says things like, "Doo Doo" (thank you) or "Boons" (balloons) or "Mo Mo" (Elmo) or when he says "Hi Dash!" (Cash).

That's all pretty darn cute and balances out those other moments when you guys mush against each other like feral rams fighting for my attention, or a certain toy or the window seat on the subway. Or the times when you guys chase each other around the house until someone inevitably falls on the floor, off the bed or couch, then cries and points a finger at the other one. Today it happened on the trampoline and Grey ended up with a bloody nose. It was the first bloody nose of this brotherhood so good for you Grey, you won that one! 

That's life and often times I'll just let you guys work it out yourselves, knowing that part of what bonds you now and forevermore will be these experiences. But I would like to thank you for those contagious fits of laughter, those squeals of joy during our "nae nae" dance parties and games of hide and seek, the tears of pain and frustration and the many smiles that brightened my summer. And most of all, I am thankful for zero trips to the emergency room.

Always & forever,

Mom 

The Color Collaborative : Blue

We have a shark enthusiast in our family, so a trip to Adventure Aquarium in Camden, New Jersey in honor of shark week was a perfect opportunity to shoot a lot of blue (embrace the grain people!).  Plus our hometown of New York City surrounded by water helped a little too.

Happy summer!

Please click HERE to continue along our blog circle starting with my dear and talented friend, Jill Cassara. 

World Class Sunset

A recent date night took my husband and me on a 47-second rocket ride into the sky.  Inside the elevator at One World Trade, whose doors are a slick three-dimensional time-lapse panorama of over 500 years of downtown Manhattan, we soared 102 stories with hardly an ear pop. 

Needless to say it was a pretty spectacular 360° sunset.   

102 stories above

102 stories below

Letters To My Sons | July

Dear sons,

I must say we've been busy this summer doing all sorts of things, going all sorts of places, and yet there is one recent morning that stands out. We were getting ready to hit the playground early before it got too hot or crowded when Cash, you came out of your room to show me you had on your red rain boots and had dressed Grey in your favorite hat and sunglasses. I couldn't help but laugh because many times in the past I had tried (unsuccessfully!) to get Grey to wear them - but since he loves YOU so much, he was happy to put on whatever you picked out. I was dying too because you guys looked like the Blues Brothers. You're too young to know who they are, so just google it and you'll see. 

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Most of the time you spent going down the big slide over and over again. Grey, you were so happy to chase behind and up the steps to the top and Cash, you were so sweet with him, giving an extra boost of encouragement, a gentle push or a playful idea: "Put your hands up Grey! Close your eyes this time!" Sometimes he'd just sit in between your legs while you slid down with your arms wrapped tightly around him. 

We left with one of you riding piggy back to the nearest Duane Reade for band-aids - yes, those rain boots made for some gnarly blisters. Heading home, well Grey, that's when you managed to throw yourself into a state. It started from something small - I think some lady had bumped you accidentally when she walked past - and within moments you were inconsolable. But it was nothing Cash and I aren't used to. Actually it was fun for us to watch all the people walk by and try to get you to stop crying. We'd just look at each other like, "Yeah okay, nice try but we know how this goes." We patiently let you wail, wait for the next bus to go by and then shout, "Grey, Look! There's a bus!!"  Bingo. 

The other day I ran into the girl who works at the liquor store who saw this all go down. And you know what she said to me?  She said we did everything right, and most of all, what a great big brother.  

You Davis Brothers who look like the Blues Brothers, who play hard and love hard and cry hard, are growing up before my eyes. 

Cash, this past year especially, I have watched you become such a helper with Grey. Whether or not he is willing to receive the help, that's another story. But one day he will discover with great certainty that you always have his back. Even nowadays when he's having a tantrum on the street you'll say to me, "I'm not leaving my brother." 

Daddy tells you guys to "look out for each other no matter what." His mother said that to him and his brothers all the time when they were growing up and you know what, they did. They held each other up in the best and worst of times. And I have no doubt you will too.

Always & forever, 

Mom, Mama, Ma-mee