Happy birthday my love. Five years ago today you came into this world and changed our lives for the better. What a cliché thing to say, but it's entirely true. The enthusiasm you have for life and for sharing it is beyond compare, that sometimes all I can do is look into those twinkly brown eyes and thank God for you.
The other night I sat at the edge of your bed and we talked about what you wanted to do on your birthday, what you hoped you'd be getting. Of course it was ALL about Power Rangers - Megazords, Vivixes, Sledge and anything Dino Charge -- complete crazy talk to me. But it's what you're into right now, and you're always so excited to describe the different characters and fighting scenarios. Just to let you know though, I secretly recorded our talk. I had to preserve that sweet little voice of yours -- what you'd call a "sound snapshot" -- from a year so great I often wish I could freeze time.
A couple of days ago while we were walking home from school, I realized that I almost never ask you to hold my hand. You do it automatically and all the time. But in my heart I know these days are numbered and it makes me a teensy bit sad. When I asked you later if you'll still hold my hand when you're Five, you laughed and said, "Yes, Mommy!", then pinky promised to hold my hand when you when you are 10, 18, 25 and even 50 years old! "FIFTY!!??" I said, "That means I'll be 86! How awesome will that be??!!"
I know I've said this before, but you have grown into a loving, caring and confident older brother. Grey absolutely adores you and follows you everywhere. Even when he's in preschool (which he just started this year), he'll point to the door and say "Cash" to let his teachers know he wants to go to your classroom. The other day both of your classes were outside at the same time and you guys ran over to hug each other through the fence. Every grownup watching had a hand on their heart because it was so sweet, while one of the teachers ran to open the gate so you guys could give each other a real embrace.
Sweet Cash, I know it's inevitable that each year you will add another number to your age. You'll grow taller and bigger, until one day you're looking down at me, forearm resting on my shoulder. You'll be a grown man with so much going on in your life that it will be hard to remember a time when you were so small and in need of guidance. But for now, I love that I can pick you up and tickle you silly, that your small hand is still cocooned in mine and that you pinky promised to hold it even when you are fifty years old.
So my love, I joyfully wish you happy birthday and pray for a fantabulous year ahead. Just so you know though, I'm going to hold you to that pinky promise we made the other night. Cause I've got it all on tape. :)
I love you son.
Always & forever,