Happy 7th Grey Grey!!!
Well you’re the first — the first Davis to have a quarantine birthday! We had originally planned to visit Grandma and Pow Pow, celebrating with a private penguin feeding at The Aviary and a corn dog lunch at Eat ‘N Park. So when Covid-19 arrived and messed things up a bit, I figured it best to prepare you.
“Grey Grey — it looks like we may have to celebrate your birthday in the apartment since we can’t go see Grandma and Pow Pow. And we really can’t go anywhere like Chuck E. Cheese or New Roc City because of the virus. But guess what?! You can plan whatever you want for the whole day. If that means cake for breakfast or Metroblast all afternoon — whatever you like. Okay?”
You seemed to accept this, even liking the idea of getting to tell everyone what to do. But as the weeks wore on, I started scouring VRBO for any house rentals in the tristate, discovering that most had either removed their listings or were waiting until the state lockdown lifted. Cash likes to say, “Mommy tackles ANY challenge and doesn’t quit!”. With your birthday falling on Memorial Day weekend, giving Daddy an extra vacation day, I did just this, not stopping until I found a rental upstate in a town I’d never heard of. You took one look at the pictures of the house, including the giant stove where “we can bake birthday treats”, and your lid of joy blew completely off.
“I’m doing the happy dance Mommy! We’re going somewhere for my birthday! I’m so excited! And oh yeah … can we do water balloons when we’re there?!!”
I like to say that Cash made me a mother but YOU Grey, completed the family. And yet it’s hard to believe our baby is seven years old! Before the Covid invasion, you and I would hold hands during our subway rides to school; I’d squeeze your hand three times to say “I love you” and you’d squeeze mine back four times to say “I love you too”. This was our daily ritual. And during those commutes you’d also share confessions, convictions and concerns which I’d try and jot down so as not to forget:
“Mommy, do you just ask someone if you want to go on a date? And what if you want to marry someone — do you just ask too? But ... what if I get down on my knee and it gets dirty?”
”Anyways I’m never getting married. I’m going to live with you forever Mommy. Even when you die I still won’t get married.”
”Will you help me when I grow up? Will you go to the store and help me buy things? ‘Cause I don’t know how to do that.”
”I wanna be a cooker when I grow up. Or an “am-buh-lunce” driver. Or maybe just live with you. I could get a police car and you could just drive around with me. Okay Mommy?”
”I don’t want to be a Dad because I don’t want to get hair on my chest . . . and my peanuts [sic] . . . and here, under my arms.”
”I wish I was a bird Mommy. A bald eagle. So I could fly to the top of the Empire State building.”
”My skin color is tan orange. No, actually , it’s white pineapple.”
”Do you know who saved us?”
Cash answers, “Jesus?”
”No, who else?”
”God?”
”No, who else?”
”The Holy Spirit?”
”No. (Long pause) Martin Luther King! Martin Luther King saved us!!””
Recently Daddy was reinforcing his brotherhood message. “Listen, I want you guys to look out for each other when you’re older,” to which you replied, “What do you mean? I’m going to live here forever — with Mommy!”
“Yeah, but Mommy and I aren’t always going to be around, so I want you guys to promise you’ll stay in touch with each other... and call each other.”
Cash’s promise was followed up by your amusing response: “Yeah Daddy when I get home from work, first I’m gonna go for a swim at the beach, then I’ll call Cash.”
But life isn’t always a swim at the beach for this little brother. In fact, it involves a great deal of suffering which you expressed during one of your epic meltdowns a few weeks back.
“He’s so mean Mommy! I don’t like Cash! I wish he wasn’t in this world!” you cried out in between gasps for air. “I wish I had a little brother … I would be nice to him … I’d be the best big brother. Not mean like Cash.”
And you’re right. Cash CAN can be a meanie — a royal jerk sometimes. We even had issues when it came time to do water balloons on your birthday. The two of you couldn’t agree on the rules, leading to arguments and tears from the birthday boy. But … after you recover from these episodes, when Cash is trying to earn back his good graces, I’ll make him give you a hug and kiss your forehead saying, “I’m sorry Grey for hurting your feelings (or whatever it was).” Then, just to make him suffer a little, I’ll tell him go through the motions all over again, only with a more loving voice. This usually lightens things up, softens your fury, and even brings about some laughter.
At times you’ll admit Cash can be a loving older brother. Like when he used his own birthday money to get you a Nintendo 2DS, or when he taught you how to use iMovie, and most recently when he defended your recurring nightmares. “Go easy on Grey Mommy. I used to have nightmares like those up until I was eight,” he said, before doing a Google search to find ways to help you manage them.
It’s all part of your growing pains; the angst of being a younger sibling who also happens to be the keeper of a sensitive soul. We all know you’re the consummate animal lover in the family, the one who doles out the most “thank-you’s”, and who finds beauty in and shows excitement about the simplest of things. While packing for our weekend getaway, you came and hugged up against me. “Mommy, thank you for working so hard to get ready for my birthday!” In that moment your tenderness put everything in perspective. This is your special gift Grey Grey. And as we were hiking along on our way to a hidden waterfall, on a beautiful spring day in upstate New York, you turned to me and said, “Mommy, it’s so beautiful here, right? I’m so happy we came on this walk!”
Me too Grey Grey! Thank you for still being our “JOY BOY”! And for completing this family seven years ago!
I love you.
Always and forever,
Mom